There is an old song that keeps coming to my mind recently. It points to how people are prone to treat each other, even those of us in the church. Sadly, I have watched the truth of this song play out, hurting people I know and even myself at times. “Signs” was released in 1970 by The Five Man Electrical Band from Canada. Here are some of the lyrics:
And the sign said, “Long-haired freaky people need not apply.”
So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why.
He said, “You look like a fine upstandin’ young man. I think you’ll do.”
So I took off my hat and said, “Imagine that. Huh, me workin’ for you!”
Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that. Can’t you read the sign?
The sign said,” You’ve got to have a membership card to get inside.”
And the sign said, “Everybody welcome. Come in, kneel down and pray.”
But when they passed around the plate at the end of it all, I didn’t have a penny to pay.
So I got me a pen and a paper, and I made up my own little sign.
I said, “Thank you, Lord, for thinkin’ ‘bout me. I’m alive and doin’ fine.”
Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that. Can’t you read the sign?
We all have our comfort zones. We like to be around people who are like us, and sometimes we struggle with those who are different than us. Sometimes we may not even know what to say to certain people, feeling like we would have little in common. So instead, we avoid them. Out of the convenience to our own comfort, we wind up treating them like they don’t even exist. That, my friends, is not love.
I’m sure several of you, like us, have been to churches where you have entered and left without meeting a single person. I, for one, have been that outcast in the past, sitting in a back row, waiting for acknowledgement from someone other than the usher whose job it is to say hi. And what a gut punch when it never comes!
Friends, we are the ekklesia. Ekklesia is the Greek word translated “church” in the Bible and means “an assembly, congregation, or governing body.” A congregation, by definition, congregates. It gathers together. It assembles for a common purpose. The common purpose of going to church is (or should be) to glorify God – through praise and worship, through the teaching, and through the interaction and the living out of our faith with the others that are there. If someone feels like they are on the outside looking in, how good a job are we doing at assembling for our common purpose? Isn’t the common purpose supposed to include everyone?
I realize that a congregation becomes what they are taught, so the root of the feel or culture of a particular church – whether good or bad – is usually the pastor. Pastors have a responsibility to teach their congregations how to love well, but ultimately, we are all taught by God. We each have a responsibility to do our part in that assembly, that gathering together. Welcoming a stranger – even one who seems like they may be very different from us – is not just the duty of the usher. If the love of God reigns in our hearts, that love will compel us to reach out to the stranger and make them feel welcome, to get to know them, to really “see” them.
My friends, love on the lonely, the strangers, the person that wears the same clothes week after week. Look for the opportunity to bring an uplifting moment to a stranger in your congregation, even someone who has been in your church for years that you don’t know or know well. It could take weeks of consistent acknowledgement to convey a true concern to someone in need. Buy them a gift card. Take them out to lunch. (That’s how I met my wife!) We don’t need a special reason to make a kind gesture. We just need love.
And don’t limit yourself to befriending strangers just in church. Take it outside the four walls to work, the grocery store, the gym, your kid’s soccer game, the homeless person sitting on the curb at Walmart.
Recently, Cherie and I stopped for ice cream at a strip mall. Sitting on a stone wall was a homeless man eating a calzone. As I sat in the bus, waiting for Cherie to come out of a store, I watched as people walked past him as if he were invisible. So I walked over to him, asked him his name, spoke a few words, and gave him a blessing bag. The man, Craig, teared up as he expressed his appreciation. “What I don’t use I will share with a friend,” he said. Wow! The man with nothing was willing to share what little he had. What a lesson on kindness and generosity!
Can we share what we do have?
There is so much to be learned from people we don’t know. The older man in front of us in line at the store struggles to find enough money in his pocket to pay for his groceries. Why? He has been paying his dying wife’s medical bills. The single mom sitting alone on a park bench watches her kids play as she scrambles to finish up her computer work for the day. Why? She is fiercely trying to figure out this work-life balance thing and feels like she’s failing miserably. The guy standing alone in the corner waiting for the bus has funny-colored hair and is covered head to toe with piercings. Why? He wants so desperately to express himself and be heard but no one seems to be listening.
And what about those in need? Don’t dwell on their outward appearance, their need for clean clothing or a good haircut or shave (1 Samuel 16:7b). Some of these people are highly educated – teachers, managers, nurses, and other prominent occupations. Others may not have the education. But every one of these people – the older man, the single mom, the guy with all the piercings, the homeless – are all people with hearts that need love. Life came and kicked them in the teeth, and we can be the ones to bring them hope and dignity by truly seeing them and bringing them God’s love. (The story of Angel in our Ministry Updates is a great example of this.)
The song “Signs” referred to all the signs out there that tell us what to do, where to go, who belongs, and by inference, who doesn’t. As we walk with the Lord, we have the opportunity to take down the signs, to stop hurting people by staying in our comfort zones, and to let them know we see them, we value them, and we love them.
Today, reach out to someone and tell them you love them (with your heart). Cherie and I love you all from our hearts!
* * * * *
The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.
~1 Samuel 16:7b
Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.
~ Hebrews 13:2-3
“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.” Then the righteous will answer him, “Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?” The King will reply, “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”
~ Matthew 25:35-40
